4 For day and night
Your hand was heavy upon me;
my strength was sapped
as in the heat of summer. ........Selah
5 Then I acknowledged my sin to you
and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, "I will confess
my transgressions to the LORD "—
and you forgave
the guilt of my sin. ........Selah
6 Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you
while you may be found;
Psalm 38:18
I confess my iniquity; I am troubled by my sin.
James 5:16
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. [emphasis added]
Friends, today I come to you in humble confession before the LORD. I am VERY troubled by my sin. Yesterday I spent the day praying over a situation that I did not know the answer to. I was willing [or so I thought] to do whatever it was that God required of me. At the close of the day God removed the situation and it looked as though all was fine - at least on my end.
But as I began to examine my heart in the entire scheme of things I realized that I had not shown true compassion - the very thing that I wrote about in the last post. God presented a real person who was in dire straights. Someone hurting and beaten by life [some of her own doing and some from the doing of another]. Instead of wrapping my arms around her and loving her and showing her GRACE - I questioned her - even 'grilled' her as to how this happened. I pushed her to the Word - but pushing didn't work. Why? Because God never pushes or forces - He only - gently prods and draws us.
God took me out of the equation - not to protect me [as others had thought] - but possible to protect the other person - all because I was not ready to open my arms or my home in the fullness of GRACE to her. The very thing I desire to do, I did not do. The very thing I never want to do - I did! Is this what Paul was talking about?
Late last night I pulled out [God's perfect timing] a new Beth Moore video all about 'forgiveness' and 'practicing confession'. She said if we practice confession more often [DAILY] - we will more likely offer more grace and forgiveness to others if we can confess and allow God to pour His grace and forgiveness over us.
Friends, I'm on the anvil today. As the Lord [My Master] is teaching me - I confess my own weakness and sin to Him and to you. Believe me I do not want sympathy over this because that will not make things better. I WAS WRONG... I FAILED! Plain and simple.
Now, I must lay it down at the foot of the CROSS and allow Christ's blood to wash me clean again. He will pick me up and dust me off and gently say, "Go and sin no more."
Jesus - You know my heart today. Your grace and love have been lavished on me even in my sin. Please allow me to take up my cross and confess daily so that I may practice YOUR forgiveness, compassion and grace. May Your grace spill over onto all who come in my path. May I remember this lesson so that I don't repeat it. Thank You for your forgiveness and love as You draw me close to You today.
Choosing JOY on the Anvil,
Stephanie
[JESUS the One I THIRST For]
6 comments:
Stephanie, this post was powerful, and I so appreciate that you felt called to write it. It's hard when we make mistakes. Harder still when God calls our attention to them. But,that's how we grow in our grace. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing. You have a precious heart! I'm sure that your friend knows that!
Hugs!
Susan
I've been on the anvil myself lately....I'm thankful that God gives me a do-over even when the world doesn't.
Love to you!!!
That's what is so awesome about our God - He so willingly and lovingly forgives us and His mercies are new every day!
Praying for you sweet sister.
BTW - what video??
How God loves a humble heart and will lift you up in Joy. How precious is the willingness to be molded by the hand of the Lord. The anvil can be painful at times, but a glorious thing we become, like Christ! Glory!
I know this place well Stephanie. I am so thankful that this is what Grace is all about.
Much love to you my friend.
My Dear Friend,
I, too, have been in this place and had to confess, repent and ask for forgiveness not only to our Father, but ask for forgiveness to the one that I never wanted to hurt in the first place. It is a very tough place to be in, but God convicted me and I needed to get right inside myself with God and the other person. I didn't have peace until I did. We all are human and I thank Him for being such a forgiving God as we confess our sins to him and repent with all humbleness.
I love you dear friend and my prayers are being said for the situation.
Peace, Love & Blessings,
Alleluiabelle
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